When I wrote my “53 things to do while I´m 53” the whole idea was having some fun. I thought that once I had solved some of my problems I would be able to recover some of the lost things that I was missing, fun being one of the most important.


I never thought that things were going to get so entangled.

I moved into my new apartment. Very small, very bright, very ventilated and with an amazing view of the city. Oh yes, my nightmare of contractors, things that went very wrong, hard work, debts and the kind was finally coming to an end. Some things needed to be done here but nothing compared to what I had been through in the past two years.
I thought that when this problem was solved I would finally have time to make some changes in other areas of my life that needed attention, work being one of them.


I never thought that work would become a threat but it did. I wanted to make some changes, I was trying to climb a step to a better place inside my area but then I learnt that I was going to be fired. What came as a shock at first as days went by turned into an opportunity for a real change. But the wheel of fortune was not in my favor and instead of proposing me to leave with my 15 year compensation, they wanted me to resign. I´m my sole provider so losing my income is not something to take lightly.


Now I´m trying to put some light on these events and to do so I took a prolonged leave of absence to give me time to think about my next steps.


I just wish I´m strong enough to disentangle this mess in the days to come. A friend of mine gave me a piece of advice that I´m taking. She said “when you don´t find a solution, change the focus otherwise you´ll get obsessed and the answers won´t come”

It´s what I´m doing right now.

53 things to do while I´m 53

This is not an original idea. I´ve taken it from somebody else. I´d like to give her/him the credit but I cannot remember where I read it. Not even sure if it was the exact same thing or just the gist.

I turned 53 the first week of September and I wrote down on a notebook 53 things to do while I´m 53. It took me a while and at times I really wished I were 20! but I completed the list the day before and I was ready to start living my 53 with the notebook next to me. And see where it goes.

There is no need to reproduce my whole list here. It´s like having  a birthday cake with some many candles that you need a fireman to put out the fire to make a wish instead of just having two candles, each one with a number, easy to blow and make your wish without putting your friends and house at risk let alone the poor fireman.

Number 3 on the list was “learn a new language” and I´ve just started a course to learn Chinese.  I had tried in the past but it was an intensive course and I need to learn at a slower pace, specially Chinese that it´s so different.  I decided to give it/me  a second chance while I´m 53.

Number 6 on the list was “take a photograph every day”. I didn´t mean the usual challenge “a photo a day” if not “reconnect with photography because it´s something you love and you are not doing it”.  If you do things you don´t want to do every day but you have to, such as going to work when you are not happy with it, why not having the same commitment with things you do want and make you happy?


It´s been 7 days now and I´m happy I wrote that list because it´s a cheerful reminder of all the nice and fun things I can do even if life gets complicated or hard.


I´ve finally sold my little house to buy my tiny apartment.

I needed the change for many reasons, the main one being I was worn out after almost three years of trying and trying even harder to make my little house home. There is a point you have to bow before the evidence: it´s not working.

I did.  Bow before the evidence.  I didn´t want to feel I was the walking version of the definition of insanity. You know, doing the same thing over and over and expect a different result?

I said goodbye to contractors, goodbye to worries every time it rained or when I heard a noise coming from the rooftop, or when hailstones hit on the glass roof and I knew it was left unprotected. That sort of things.

Now I just enjoy the urban landscape from my balcony without thinking that some poor job may hurt me or others.

I have a lot to do in here but as it´s small I don´t care much.

View from the kitchen


I wouldn´t define myself as a cat person or a dog person because I love both cats and dogs.

However, if asked, I relate more to cats. They are Independent, curious, adventurous, intelligent, observant, affectionate without being clingy, a little bit moody too.

And there is one more thing, they are sympathetic too !!!


A tale of one city

I really didn´t know how to start posting again after months of utter silence. I tried but I couldn´t.  Till today, I was going over old files and I found a piece of writing I posted years ago when I had a Myspace account.  It downed on me that it was a good start, even if old. With minor changes it pretty much reflects what is going on in my life right now.

Here it goes …


It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.

It was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness.

It was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity.

It was the season of light, it was the season of darkness.

It was the summer of hope, it was the summer of despair.

I had everything before me, I had nothing before me.

I was all going direct to hell, I was all going direct the other way.

I moved.

It was the best of times because I was going to have my own house for the first time in my life.
It was the worst of times because I got it out of a painful event.

It was the age of wisdom because I thought it was the best I could do given the circumstances.
It was the age of foolishness because I thought it was not the best I could do given the circumstances.

It was the epoch of belief, I was going home.
It was the epoch of incredulity, was it home?

It was the summer of hope because I thought I was going to find some peace.
It was the summer of despair because I didn´t find it.

I had everything before me, countless written pages.
I had anything before me, countless blank pages.

I was all going direct to hell, letting negative thoughts grow.
I was all going direct the other way, when I started fighting them.

So I moved. So I´m here. A new place. Still not “me” but on its way.






I really don´t know how to come back to this blog. It´s been so long and so many things happened that I don´t really know where to start.

So for now, let me say just “Hello!” till I find the way to narrate what´s been going on in this far flung kingdom …



The Universe

Thanks to two friends from here, I now get letters from the Universe.

Here’s what the Universe wrote to me this morning:

You’re the kind of person, Ellen
Who’s hard to forget,
A one-in-a-million
To the people you’ve met.
Your friends are as varied
As the places you go,
And they all want to tell you
In case you don’t know:
That you make a big difference
In the lives that you touch,
By taking so little
And giving so much!

Ellen, you are so AWESOME! For your birthday, friends and angels from every corner of the Universe, including buddies you didn’t know you had, will be with you to wish you the HAPPIEST of days and an exciting new year in time and space. You won’t be alone!

Isn’t it lovely to be greeted with such enthusiasm?


It’s very early …

Have a good day people!!!